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chandracloud
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| Joined: | Thu Jun 25th, 2009 |
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Posted: Fri Jun 26th, 2009 04:22 pm |
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My spouse lived one year away from his family with another woman. The other woman, completely different from his Christian wife, was a professed 'witch' and convicted drug seller/user.
I struggled financially, trying to care for my children on my own. I would not allow him to take my precious girls to the other woman's home. Thankfully, the judge listened and gave me full custody. The timing was at the end of a my masters school program. His timing of the affair, worsening emotional and physical abuse of me seemed like he didn't want me to finish and have success in my education even though it was done to help improve the support of my family including him! When the relationship with the new woman failed he begged to come home and went off drugs but never returned to church. I recognize now that repentance and support of Christians is the only way for men to recover (which he says he doesn't need).
Now five years later, he is again showing signs of crisis and mental deterioration. Interesting timing as I re-entered school with the goal of becoming a professor in my field. His emotional abuse is worsening and a specific woman is calling on the phone since I came back from a trip (he was home alone). At points I couldn't reach him when I was gone. He yells I am psychotic and paranoid but as I began praying for discernment, immediately this woman begins to call both his cell and our home phone.
I do not know what to do. I have forgiven him once but feel that letting this continue would be detrimental to me, my children, and most of all him. any advice or thoughts?
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truthseeker
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| Joined: | Tue May 16th, 2006 |
| Location: | New Jersey USA |
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Posted: Fri Jun 26th, 2009 11:07 pm |
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Hi chandracloud,
Welcome to BG.
While I have known people whose marriages survived an affair, denying that boundaries have been crossed is not a good sign, not to mention the abusiveness you mention.
Did the two of you seek any counselling after his year long affair? Would he be open to that now?
Praying for you...
TruthSeeker
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Mechelle
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| Joined: | Sat Jun 13th, 2009 |
| Location: | Texas USA |
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Posted: Tue Jun 30th, 2009 12:19 pm |
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Hi Chandracloud,
Is he actively seeking help for his addiction? If so discuss with him the posibility that his current therapy is not enough.
____________________
~Mechelle~
"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny compared to what lies within us."(Emerson)
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