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| Moderated by: truthseeker, bil4913 | Page:   1 2 |
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| Being single | Rate Topic |
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| Posted: Tue Sep 13th, 2011 11:38 am |
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21st Post |
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TM2 Member
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Would the sexual aspect of the massage still be a problem if you insisted on, say, an older male masseur? If not, then this would seem like an easy solution. Tim M.
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| Posted: Tue Sep 13th, 2011 11:52 am |
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22nd Post |
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Man Member
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TM2 wrote: Would the sexual aspect of the massage still be a problem if you insisted on, say, an older male masseur?Yes, I think so.
____________________ May the Lord bless you all! |
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| Posted: Sun Sep 18th, 2011 09:20 pm |
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23rd Post |
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Man Member
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Some physical reactions might be the same just because of the physical. It might be the same who does it? What's up guys? How's it going?
____________________ May the Lord bless you all! |
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| Posted: Thu Sep 22nd, 2011 03:13 pm |
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24th Post |
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Man Member
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Back-problems; Donno how to deal with this... Anyone experienced something similar and found good solutions? I want my back to be perfect working again. So what I want is getting my back fixed perfectly without any sexual undescent things. Last edited on Thu Sep 22nd, 2011 03:37 pm by Man ____________________ May the Lord bless you all! |
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| Posted: Thu Sep 29th, 2011 10:55 pm |
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25th Post |
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Man Member
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I am living as single and I find it difficult, long for the physical contact, but don't know if there is something under that make me long so much for it. I.e when it comes to food. It is possible to overeat because of other needs, but I guess there is also so that the body needs nutrition, What about physical contact; Does the body need it or is it only something that is an escape from something else?
____________________ May the Lord bless you all! |
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| Posted: Fri Sep 30th, 2011 01:10 am |
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26th Post |
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truthseeker Administrator 
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Hi Man, I don't know if this has been studied in adults, but there is a pretty well-known study done at an orphanage where they found that babies whose needs for food and hygiene were met, bottles propped up, etc., sometimes died even when they appeared to be physically healthy. The only thing they could attribute it to was a lack of loving touch. TruthSeeker
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| Posted: Fri Sep 30th, 2011 07:43 am |
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27th Post |
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Man Member
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Yes, if it is a real need, how to meet it in a decent way? I guess there are some solutions somewhere?
____________________ May the Lord bless you all! |
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| Posted: Fri Oct 7th, 2011 07:06 pm |
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28th Post |
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Man Member
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Yes, I really wonder about this: If the need for skin-contact is real or if it is a substitute-need. If it is real, how to deal with it? If it is not real, if there is something under; What can that be a and how to deal with it? Hmmmm...
____________________ May the Lord bless you all! |
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| Posted: Mon Oct 24th, 2011 03:33 am |
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29th Post |
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jjules Member
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run from temptation! thats the short answer. perhaps pain killers, and physiotherapy exercises to execute in the water (like a heated swimming pool) would increase mobility and lessen pain? with every temptation God has already provided a door of escape for you, i dont know your history, but thinking on it is the first step towards sexual sin. best wishes to you x.
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| Posted: Sun Nov 27th, 2011 09:03 am |
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30th Post |
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Man Member
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The back-problems are there, and I don't know how to deal with it. I am not here to be fixed. Anyone has some solutions for themselves or heard about it; Something that can fix or help; Being single, maybe in need of skin-contact and having back-problems. I don't want anyone to cross my boundaries and fix me, but if you have something to share about in "I-form" or some facts or whatever and you want to share, then I might pick up whatever is helpful and leave the rest. Please don't go into my space, but present something that you might have found helpful in your own life or something else that you find helpful. I don't want to allow anyone to violate my boundaries, i.e. fixing me, telling me what to do etc. My best!
____________________ May the Lord bless you all! |
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| Posted: Sun Nov 27th, 2011 11:13 am |
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31st Post |
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truthseeker Administrator
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At various times I have found chiropractic care or accupuncture/pressure to be helpful. A chiropractor should take xrays to make sure there is no underlying orthopedic problem. I don't think accupuncturists do that. TruthSeeker
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| Posted: Sun Nov 27th, 2011 07:54 pm |
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32nd Post |
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Man Member
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Thanks for sharing. I haave tried chiropractic and "all" other forms of therapy, but my back is not working sometimes. It´s bad.
____________________ May the Lord bless you all! |
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| Posted: Mon Nov 28th, 2011 08:24 pm |
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33rd Post |
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guitarist63 Member
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Sorry you've still got trouble with the back, Man. Thanks truthseeker for your thoughts on the subject. My back doctor (not exactly a chiropractor) did push some vertibrae back (I heard them go back with a crunch), but he didn't X-ray. I don't use him now. I took a huge risk. Fortunately, the back appears to have benefited from his treatment. He prescribed a back excercise for me which I have tried to do regularly in the past but lacking discipline, have not continued. It was to lie on the floor (a hard, flat floor, a duvet under the back, the head resting on one pillow, the lower parts of the legs to lie flat together on a chair seat placed in line with the body. The form of the body, if viewing from the side of a person in this position, would be almost like a Z, except that the back should form a right angle with the top of the legs. I was told to lie in this position, palms facing upwards, for twenty minutes and to breathe deeply and out again, ensuring that there was a source of fresh air - from an open window. At the present I get back pain mostly at night but it is not serious. Last edited on Mon Nov 28th, 2011 08:25 pm by guitarist63 |
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| Posted: Mon Nov 28th, 2011 08:44 pm |
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34th Post |
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Man Member
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Guitarist63: Thanks for sharing about yourself.
____________________ May the Lord bless you all! |
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| Posted: Thu Mar 15th, 2012 03:09 pm |
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35th Post |
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Man Member
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I am a single man. It seems to me that I need skin-contact? I am not sure? Just a share. Don't need to be fixed, but maybe someone has something to share that can be helpful. Massage can very easily be sexual, I think.
____________________ May the Lord bless you all! |
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| Posted: Fri Mar 16th, 2012 03:45 pm |
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36th Post |
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ashamedhusband Member
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The Bible tells us that God did not mean for man to be alone. However, He also teaches us to learn tolerance, and to fast so that we may be shown the strength we have to go without. I have to remember that while I may strive for affection and sensual stimuli - that I will not die without it. However, I do feel it's unhealthy to go for extended periods of abstinence (ie, several years). Unless God tells me otherwise, His desire is for me to find companionship and a healthy relationship so that I can find a healthy outlet for my natural, God-given desires. The issue I struggle with is allowing my natural desires to serve an unnatural purpose. That's why I'm in SA, and am abstaining from all forms of self-pleasure and self-gratification through lustful images/thoughts. I am not ashamed of my desires to be with my wife, for I embrace those thoughts. Even if I were single I would still desire to be with my wife to be. I have to come to understand that they are a part of what God has intended for me and my spouse / future spouse.
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| Posted: Fri Mar 16th, 2012 09:26 pm |
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37th Post |
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Man Member
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It's difficult to be single if I was created for marriage? Hmmmm... I can pretend sexuality is not there, but it might not help me very much... If I don't eat, I might get problems, but overeating might not be good as well, but if I live as single and I have a sexual desire, and I can't go anywhere. Hmmmm... Only a sharing. Please don't judge or fix if judging is not necessary. Last edited on Sun Mar 18th, 2012 12:14 pm by Man ____________________ May the Lord bless you all! |
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| Posted: Sun Mar 18th, 2012 12:05 am |
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38th Post |
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ashamedhusband Member
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I'm not sure if I understand your reply. I don't dismiss my sexuality, it's always going to be there. I've found some constructive ways to channel that energy. I am a road cyclist, and I've noticed significant improvements in my stamina and strength. I never really understood why athletes abstained from sex before competition but I can see why now. It's quite a charge to feel the rush of a nice dose of adrenaline on a sprint - or to feel the warmth cascade down my body as I pray out to God. I used to create these sensations through masturbation but today I've found much healthier and constructive ways to experience life. In a way, I feel your pain brother. I'm living in a studio apartment away from my wife - and the time we spend together (and it's more than we used to spend living together) - we do things like hike, volunteer for our community, attend 12-step meetings, and study the bible. I do not dare ask her for sex, or to even hold her hand. When she is ready for these things, she will ask for them. After violating her for 2 1/2 years she deserves some peace, and some measure of control over the manipulative man she didn't even realize she had married. I realize how hard it is to come out on the open with our sins, but I can honestly say that I know a freedom today that I've never known before in my life. I praise Him for giving the strength to carry on even in the midst of so many doubts and unknowns.
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| Posted: Sun Mar 18th, 2012 12:21 pm |
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39th Post |
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Man Member
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ashamedhusband wrote: "I'm not sure if I understand your reply." What did you not understand? "In a way, I feel your pain brother." Are you talking to me? What kind of pain do you feel? I don't get you. My best Greetings with 3. John, verse 2.
____________________ May the Lord bless you all! |
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| Posted: Tue May 8th, 2012 09:45 pm |
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40th Post |
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Man Member
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Sorry if someone find this offending, but when being single my body can be very sensitive when abstaing.
____________________ May the Lord bless you all! |
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