Paulos
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Hello, Sailorsgirl.
Not every habit is an addiction. Habits are hard to break, but an addiction spins out of control and wreaks havoc in the victim's life. Habits are acquired by repetition, but an addiction is often rooted in deep wounds to the personality. Theoreticians are still debating whether there is such a thing as sexual addiction, and, if so, how to distinguish it from an unwanted habit. From your description, it sounds like you may have a childish habit but not necessarily an addiction.
The majority of Christian ethicists over the centuries have considered masturbation sinful in some degree. The basic reason is that sexuality is meant to express love and bonding to a spouse, generation of offspring being the natural fruit; yet masturbation is done by an isolated individual apart from the context of a relationship and is unprocreative, so is an obviously defective act in comparison with marital intercourse. This moral reasoning is based on the total view of sexuality outlined in the Bible, not on a particular verse, for there's no reference in the Bible specifically to m. as such.
We don't really "need that release for our bodies at times." Even a secular textbook on sexuality can contain the statement, "While masturbation can be a pleasurable learning experience and important to a persons' [sic] sexual life, it is not essential for physical or mental well-being" (Gary F. Kelly, Sexuality Today: The Human Perspective [3rd ed.; Dushkin, 1992], p. 260).
You've already discovered an important key for leaving m. behind. Concentrating too hard on it can make the problem worse, relaxing about it can make things better. Like the Chinese Finger Trap, where the harder you pull against it, the tighter its grip becomes. Often, ironically, it's those who are most determined in their efforts to rid themselves of a m. habit who are held most firmly by it. To love God with all our being, and our fellow human as ourselves, should be our focus.
God bless you as you work through these issues.
Last edited on Thu Aug 14th, 2008 06:23 pm by Paulos
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