| ||||
| ||||
| Moderated by: truthseeker, bil4913 |
|
||||||||||||||
| Don't know what to do - help! | Rate Topic |
| Author | Post |
|---|
| Posted: Wed Jun 8th, 2011 03:04 am |
|
1st Post |
|
beccy d. Member
|
Hey, my name’s Bec, from Australia. I’ve been having some issues with this stuff and wasn’t sure who to speak to…I was searching for someone I could email on the net and came across this forum, so I hope that’s okay. I’m 17 years old, just graduated last year, and now am studying a Bachelor of Ministries by distance. I have a real passion for ministry and God and everything to do with that stuff. Although I’ve ‘always’ been a Christian, when I was about 15 I suffered with depression and became suicidal, but then God really revealed Himself to me and changed my life. I knew it wasn’t going to be an easy life, but God really changed me and I’ve been seeking Him ever since. It’s only recently that I’ve begun to realise that I never gave everything to God, and it’s freaking me out. I want to be all for God; completely His…I want to help other young women get through their tough times, but I just feel so messed up! When I was younger, I remember having a number of ‘sexual’ experiences – I wasn’t sexually abused, but I remember being around some other kids my age who were into sexual things (I wouldn’t have been 9 or 10). Around that age, when I played with my Barbies, etc. I would pretend that they were having sex and stuff! Once I was in highschool, I desperately craved love from guys, but just on the inside, because I had a really low self-esteem. I would fantasise about being with a guy, kissing him or whatever. Last year I had a boyfriend for about a month and a half, and we never even kissed (mainly because I never really liked him that much, I just enjoyed feeling loved). He was really physical and sometimes I was uncomfortable with the sexual emotions I had, especially after I broke up with him. I didn’t even want to be with him, because he wasn’t a nice, Christian guy who respected me – but I could feel the devil trying to get into my head. I still have fantasies, but recently they’ve gotten worse. Sometimes I look through peoples photos on facebook (girls in bikinis and other stuff) and feel turned on by it – it can be the same with a couple of tv programs I have watched which had a high sex content. One night a couple of weeks ago, I found myself in an extreme fantasy which made me feel extremely ‘excited’ and then I experimented with masturbation. After I did it, I suddenly felt so horrible and disgusting a dirty – I cried and prayed for so long. Since then, I tried to stop having these fantasies, but I’ve failed (though I haven’t done anything nearly this bad). In the last week, I’ve had horrible, erotic (involuntary) dreams which feel so real, some involving all sorts of sexual acts with guys OR girls. And to clarify, I LIKE GUYS! A lot. I’m NOT into girls…so this is just making me feel SUPER screwed up!! I want to stop being and feeling this way, because I know it’s wrong, and it’s not me! I want to be a virgin until I’m married, and I intend to do that. But right now I feel like I can’t become close to a guy or be in a relationship because I need to be whole first. But I don’t know how to be whole. I know God needs to be my priority…I just feel so stuck. I don’t want to be the girl with an issue with sex. I never thought sex was important to me, and I don’t think it really is: I’ve always been attracted to guys for who they are and their relationship with God, and never even considered having sex with them, unless it involved MARRYING them first! Then all of a sudden, I have these huge sexual temptations like I’ve never felt before! And I want out! HELP!
|
||||||||||||||
| |||||||||||||||
| Posted: Wed Jun 8th, 2011 10:31 am |
|
2nd Post |
|
truthseeker Administrator 
|
Hi Beccy, I'm running out to work, but will get back with some thoughts later today. TruthSeeker
|
|||||||||||||
| ||||||||||||||
| Posted: Wed Jun 8th, 2011 08:29 pm |
|
3rd Post |
|
truthseeker Administrator
|
Hi Beccy, http://www.settingcaptivesfree.com has an online course on purity, which may be of help. If depression still troubles you at all, they have one for that also. If you have a resource for Christian counseling, that might help you to identify what legitimate need you are trying to fill, other ways to do so, and to heal from whatever has left that void in your life. I'm not sure what your most extensive source for Christian self-help books would be, but at the bottom of this list are some titles by Stormie Omartian and one by Beth Moore that may be worthwhile reading. The links are no good, but you will have all the info you need to find them elsewise on the net. http://www.blazinggrace.org/forums/view_topic.php?id=1110&forum_id=6&highlight=stormie As you may have noticed, not many ladies who struggle have been here lately, but if you try sending some of the more recent ones a private message, it may activate an email notification. The same may be true of commenting on their threads. Praying for you... TruthSeeker
|
||||||||||||||
| |||||||||||||||
| Posted: Fri Sep 2nd, 2011 10:02 pm |
|
4th Post |
|
tiffandrock Member
|
Hi, this sadly is more normal then you think. It is becoming an epidemic of young women expermimenting with things, and then feeling very shamed and upset. Alot of young women have been sexually abused. When that happens they either don't want anything to do with sex, or want it all the time. I had to deal with that. And growing up I made a lot of bad choices, because I was craving attention from men. I really just needed love and support from my dad. My advice to you, is find a quiet place, and just talk to God. Pray to him, tell him your struggles. Make it a priority to talk with him everyday. He will be your best support. Read your bible, there are alot of good books for young women. Message to the people on this site. Please becareful who you trust with your issues. We are all vunerable. There are people out there that will take advantage of vunerable people. So just becareful. God bless.
|
|||||||||||||
| ||||||||||||||
| Current time is 07:24 am | |
| > The Journey to Grace > Women Who Struggle with Sex Addiction > Don't know what to do - help! | Top |
