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John John
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Posted: Tue Sep 23rd, 2008 03:27 am |
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Hi,
I'm your typical young guy with your typical male struggles for sexual purity. Here's my situation or question:
I've been a porn watcher since I was 14, stopped for a while then resumed it again because I couldn't take the tension being built up. I am a real Christian, loving the Lord and can truly say I am saved! However, trying to be pure is a struggle. I've read all the books and attended SAA meetings. They all help. Prayer is the best helper of all. After a while though, the desire still creeps back. I'm holding out but not sure how much longer I can. One thing that I keep thinking of is how normal I felt when I slipped and stayed watching it for a while. When I did watch it, it wasn't all the time and didn't feel like an addiction. I'm thinking because i know I can't watch it, the more I want to watch it. Sadly enough, I miss it. I love the Lord more but I know he will forgive me.
What are you guys doing to keep your purity? Did you slip? How frequently?
God Bless!
P.S. The extreme guilt by knowing you're going against Christ's wants for you is a true indicator of knowing you're a Christian.
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CB
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Posted: Tue Sep 23rd, 2008 11:41 am |
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Hey John John,
The thing that I had to do was get very honest with God, with my wife, and most importantly with myself. I told my wife about my "problem" a long time before I was really ready to give it up. The hard fact is, is that I honestly enjoyed looking at pornography; I honestly enjoyed masturbating. I really enjoyed thinking lustful thoughts. I didn't like the pain it was causing my wife, or the pain it was causing Jesus, but I was still having my "fun for a season".
Regretfully, I caused my wife untold hurt and pain. But the pain I was causing my wife gave me a snapshot of the pain I was causing Jesus. I realized that I actually enjoyed doing something that put Jesus on the cross. But still, in my own power, I wasn't strong enough. I had to finally stop and say, "God, I simply cannot do this anymore. I'm not strong enough to beat this. I need You."
The story of Mary and Martha (Luke 10:38-42) came alive to me in a completely different way the other day. In this story, Jesus was going to Mary and Martha's house. The house was a mess. The dishes needed to be done. The house hadn't been vacuumed in a while. Drinks needed to be served. Dinner needed to be prepared. And here we have a picture of two people responding to Jesus in two very different ways.
Martha was your typical, religious person that wanted to make herself better before she met Jesus. She wanted to clean up the messes in her life, and she wanted to have something to offer Jesus. Mary, on the other hand, sat at Jesus' feet in full view of all the junk in her life. She didn't try to clean up her "house".
And the beautiful thing is that Jesus doesn't even want us to clean up our mess. He just wants us to come to Him. Because He's the only one that can really do the deep cleaning that needs to be done to get to the root of the problem.
CB!
____________________
cbthinking.blogspot.com
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minuspride
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Posted: Tue Sep 23rd, 2008 06:05 pm |
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Well said.... I can tell you allowed the lord to work on your heart.
God BLess You CB!
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guitarist63
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Posted: Tue Sep 23rd, 2008 08:57 pm |
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Last edited on Thu Sep 25th, 2008 09:57 pm by guitarist63
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guitarist63
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Posted: Fri Sep 26th, 2008 08:23 pm |
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Welcome John John
I don't see how I can help you much. Although I haven't looked at porn for a long time now I can't shake off the m habit - yet.
The verses about fleeing sexual immorality spell it out for me. That's what I need to do. It maybe a few seconds of a window of opportunity to flee but I know I didn't take that opportunity today.
I don't consider frequency is of much relevance. One sin will send me to the roasting fires of hell where the worms never die for eternity if Jesus did not forgive me. I know I can't earn salvation but it's important for me to make as much an effort as I can to be clean in body, mind and spirit and all with God's help.
Last edited on Fri Sep 26th, 2008 08:30 pm by guitarist63
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Pastruesi
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Posted: Thu Oct 9th, 2008 06:18 pm |
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John John wrote:
P.S. The extreme guilt by knowing you're going against Christ's wants for you is a true indicator of knowing you're a Christian.
Unfortunately it's not. In the Bible, Felix undoubtedly felt guilty as he trembled when Paul preached righteousness to him, but as far as we know he never became a Christian. The Puritan pastoral theologians were careful to distinguish between conscience and grace.
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