When He Crosses the Line

Posted: Feb 08, 2019

When He Crosses the Line

By Mike Genung

A man gets addicted to porn at an early age. He spends years immersing himself in it. Perhaps he goes in deeper and has sex with prostitutes, commits adultery, has affair, or gets into other forms of sexual sin.

Over the years, his heart turns rock-hard. His inner misery escalates, and anger gains a foothold. If he keeps going without getting help, anger can morph into rage. Once rage gets a grip, the game gets dangerous and now the chances of him crossing the line into physical abuse increase.

I know of women who have been punched, choked, raped, and even murdered by their porn-addicted husbands. It’s not as rare as you think. And yes, I’m talking about men who attend church every Sunday.

When this happens, my counsel to the wife is always the same: get out of the house, now. Once your husband has crossed the line into physical abuse, it’s imperative that you leave; until he gets help the chances of him hurting you again and with more force ratchet up. You dare not take that chance.

If you have kids, there’s no guarantee they will exempt from his abusive behavior either. I’ve counseled enough men and women who were beaten or abused by their fathers at an early age to know this is a risk. They need to go with you.

You could look at staying with a friend, relative, hotel, or a shelter for women who’ve been physically assaulted. Ask God where He wants you to go if you’re uncertain, and He will provide the answer.

Promises of change are meaningless; I wouldn’t recommend returning until he’s taken consistent action steps to recover and heal over an extended period of time, which should include being involved in weekly (preferably daily) accountability, and has been seeing a counselor to deal with his root issues.

If this article is describing your situation, please take action now.